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i can't believe what you did i want to close my eyes i want to close my eyes i want to close my eyes and you just sit there smiling, you should be ashamed to look at me, i should be ashamed at your touch on me, i want to close my eyes i want to fill the images of you with fire and blacken every thought of you with every ounce of bloodied stomach acid you made me swallow when you waltzed around and smiled like nothing mattered, when you graced me with a kiss you bitch i should have spit in your face and walked away and set that room on fire so you'd know how it felt to be a few degrees hotter than you'd like with no way out except the window... i should have been hateful.. i should have been cruel... i want to close my eyes i want to close my eyes i want to close my eyes because you repulse me with every word that made me sweat and every move that filled me with want i want to close my eyes i hope you grow old somewhere in montana a shriveled failure i hope you never know a touch of happiness i hope you end up miserable and alone then you'll know how you made me feel then you'll know why i hate you then you'll know what it feels like to kiss the person who has their foot on your throat then you'll know pain, hate, and loneliness... then you'll know me like you never knew me, like you never bothered, like you never wanted... i want to close my eyes i want to set your pictures on fire and close my eyes i want to shred those letters and close my eyes i want to know you're unhappy and close my eyes forever... © 1996, h e a t h . h o u s t o n |